Etikettarkiv: gotland

The Plague of Visby

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Giving it a try to get something posted. I haven’t really been able to sit straight during longer periods for a week now, but I feel the need to write and not just lie on the couch and stare at the day TV.

Last time I posted I had just gotten to my grandmother’s. I was feeling feverish and went to bed early. She’s a sweety but that bed is horrible. I didn’t sleep well at all, if I didn’t wake up from the fever or the coughing I woke up from the bed hurting my body. The plan was that I was going back to Eric on the friday, after me and grandma had gone to the cemetary to put some flowers on Anna’s grave, but I was so weak on friday I just stayed in bed all day. Same on saturday, but I could manage to move down to the couch for a while on saturday night to watch some criminal shows which was a relief. That small, brown room I resided it… It is cute and nice and homey in it’s own way, but not the funniest place to spend your ill days. Sunday I imagined I felt a bit better so I was actually up for a couple of hours waiting for Eric to drive me to the airport. My dear, sweet Eric ♥ My very best friend and I guess almost soulmate..?

I was afraid they wouldn’t let me on the plan due to the influenza, but they either didn’t notice or didn’t care. The flight was 15 minutes shorter than planned but it felt like it took twice the time. Rasmus from work was a true knight in a shining armor and actually picked me up from the airport to drive me home, which I really, really appreciated. Thank you! You saved my weekend, tbh ♥

I have been home from work all week so far. Fever still sneaks in from time to time, but mainly because I cough so my lungs hurt. Dry coughing. It hurts my tummy, my head and my lungs. Due to a bad combination of being depressed and having the flu (it is NOT the stomach flu!) I have lost 6 kilos during January. I look thinner, and of course I appreciate being closer to my weight goal, but this is not how I wanted to achieve success :(

I will be going back to get some rest now. I will try to write more here soon, but be patient please.

Lovely, pretty, beautiful Visby.

When things get from bad to worse

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The fever is a fact. I am freezing my sweet ass off and I am feeling way too hot, in a non-sexy way. I am weak and tired and my body aches. Not a very happy camper right now. Not in the least.

I bought a pretty pentagram in town. It is small and with something that reminds of an amethyst. Good stuff.

I am at my grandmother’s place right now. Watching really bad TV shows, but it makes her happy. Will go take a bath in a little while though, and hope that the hot water will make me feel better. Most of all I want to lie down to rest. Preferably in my own bed, but that is not a possibility. Miserable. I am, again, stuck in my head with all these thoughts.

Had a very good conversation with Amanda yesterday though. Helped me get some distance to everything that hurts me right now. It didn’t make everything magically allright, but it gave me some hope for the future. Thank you Amanda, and thank you Leo. You were both there for me yesterday when I needed you. I love you guys <3

Something wicked this way comes

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The anxiety is back. Angst. Feeling ill and empty. I kept it off me for a day and now it is back with full force. I try to fend myself against it, but it keeps getting harder.
I am better than this.

Spent the night at Leo’s and Amanda’s. Much needed. I think I had too much tea though – cut me and I will be bleeding lemon and honey. Will be going into town with Amanda in a little bit. The plan is to find an item of jewellry, something to keep me reminded of home. Witch stuff. Granny Weatherwax. I am channelling. And now I am ranting, so never mind.

Going to my grandmother’s tonight. Bath tub. Much needed, I feel an urge to be surrounded by hot water and a regular shower just won’t do. Blub blub.

The week is almost at an end. Three days left. Right now I feel that I would need another month here to re-charge. I need to feel Gotland beneath my feet. This is where I find my strength that I so much need. …I am very needy right now. And complainy, for all that matters. I AM better than this.

I need to go back to where I was, mentally, the day before yesterday. I was the witch and I was the wood spirit and I was the ocean. Today I am nothing. I AM BETTER THAN THIS.

Feeling ill. I started coughing yesterday, and I keep feeling hot. Meh. Stop that, I am miserable enough without being ill to boot!

Ohwell. Off to town we go.

You can take a girl out of the ocean, but you cannot take the ocean out of the girl

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Spent three hours walking around town yesterday, with my camera. Even went to church to light a candle for my sister. Got to breathe the clean Visby air and watch my beautiful ocean for a while.

Then I went home to my grandmother for some fika, which was nice. Will spend the night at her place tomorrow so I can steal her bath tub for a while, mwahaha! Zombie enjoy hot water :3

A nice fika with Eva followed that, and we ran into Ingrid whom I haven’t seen for 6-7 years. Small island this ^^

Today I’ll be hanging out with Leo, yay! Just waiting for him to get back to me, so watching really lousy day-TV with Eric and Elisabeth in the meantime.

A post written in english!

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Sitting in Eric’s apartment and chillaxing. Talking about WoW with Elisabeth and just finished watching Kröd Mändoon. Eneas wanted to dance so I’m really tired in my legs now, but it was worth it ;)

The picture above is showing Elric, the baby boy who will be one month this week :) He spent an hour sleeping on my chest earlier today, so cute. So yes, I still want one of my own ;)

Visby is wet and snowy and melty. Will probably take the camera for a walk tomorrow, but cannot promise that I will get any great pictures :P

Will continue chilling now. Vacation is nice <3